day by day

Today I remembered you nothing new... at times i feel as if i where in a deep hole that never ends that i just keep falling deeper and deeper into your memory , like a traumatic event that you don't remember clearly how it all happened but the fragment of trauma keep repeating themselves over and over again like a broken record , I wish to be in Puerto Rico again and visit that place just to feel something because i may remember the feeling and even cry from time to time but somehow  other than that i don't feel at all but this endless sadness and darken shadowy aura , i don't know if not feeling other than this is normal but this is just momentaneous, most of the time i get to block the feeling for sometime but not erase it , I wish this down part goes soon and act as if nothing happen the rest of the year , there's always ups and downs in a year with me but i think this year is the hardest , this one is the great finally the letting go year , the final play in this love sick one sided love story of mines , this will be my darkest hour but i will take it as it comes and slowly forget what was already forgotten long ago not from me of course... it will become from night to day or viseversa  just for the fact that the collection of memories will not be as vivid as day but turn cold and peaceful as night ...